Friday, May 28, 2010

"MOVE IT FOOTBALL-HEAD!"

Anyone who grew up during the golden age of Nickelodeon will know who this, nine year old, pig-tailed terror is. This is my modest salute to the girl whom I believe is the greatest animated female character of all time; Helga G. Pataki of Craig Bartlett's Hey Arnold! For those of you who do not know, Helga is a bully with a secret, a HUGE crush on the show sage-like protagonist, Arnold. To hide her feelings, she teases him mercilessly. But behind closed doors, she spouts sonnets and fills volumes of poetry with verses dedicated to her secret love.

Each morn, you bend to drink,
from love's own crystal pool.
I tremble near you, try to think.
Will I forever say, "you stink?"
Am I bound by this tragic rule?

I cannot think of a more lovable, multi-dimensional, or more sympathetic character. I think, deep inside us, we all have a little Helga (for who hasn't had a childhood crush that they pursued in counter productive ways). Indeed, But nothing beats her intelligence, her sense of humor or her overflowing heart.


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